Me for Wildfox

It is the conclusion of another day in Los Angeles. The three quarter moon looks enormous enough to crush us all under its glow and I am assessing my day. I often feel a void within, a guilt that screams,”You did nothing worthwhile today!” When those thoughts creep in sometimes a gal just has to step back and do the math. Often a good conversation is worth checking off a To Do list so… why am I so hard on myself?

Today I ventured through the beach towns to audition for a car commercial. (Went well.) From there I drove onto the Fox lot and peered at the Simpson’s paraphernalia before I picked up a show tape for my boss. Afterwards a splendid meeting took place in a little French cafe with Andy and Amanda; we plan on shooting a short this week. Next I bought pieces perfect for our costumes at Out of the Closet. I spent time at home with our new rabbit and tortoises before Meredith drove me to a lovely dinner with Kim and her dad. Lastly, the four of us joined Marissa for a show at my improv school… but I did “nothing” today, huh?

My self-doubt got me wondering, what is my idea of “accomplishment”? Do I need to be raking in a paycheck to feel worthwhile day by day? … Something to consider and work on.

I want to make a habit of this being a story blog, not a picture blog. However, this is a shoot that my best friend Kim invited me to style alongside her, Emily, and Meredith. Kim and Emily created the wonderful Wildfox which is doing so well. I’m so proud to be a part of their creative process and no matter how sick I became running all over town I had a blast at every turn.

These are in order of my liking, not in order of the adorable story Kim created.  For the full story visit: I Love Wildfox!

“SHOT BY EMIR ERALP STYLED BY BRENDA KING, KIM GORDON, EMILY FAULSTICH AND MEREDITH LEYERZAPH MAKEUP BY CARLENE K / HAIR BY NINA LUCA”

At last I am sitting on our white shag rug and the yellow cushions I lazily drug from our couch. The Wildfox shoot is all done and the photos are incredible! Can’t wait to show you the results on Monday or so.

Drew just landed a job working at his dream post production company. It’s the equivalent of me walking on the Paramount lot or a spoiled bimbo getting her own reality show on E!.

Solve Sundsbo

For a while I was thinking: I’m a twenty six year old professional errand-runner. Of course if anyone asked, “I’m an actress and writer!” However, the sinking economy had taken the boatload of my professions down with it. At twenty three I was a celebrity stylist assistant, often taking lead in photoshoots for television shows and magazines. By twenty four I was a consistently paid writer fashion editing a magazine and freelancing for Universal Music Group. By twenty five it was all gone, some by choice but most by the force of plummeting markets. Gigs that used to seek out SAG actresses begged for non-union and clothing lines who once threw money left and right offered pathetic pennies to get the job done.

Despite the troubling facts good fortune followed me and made it difficult to ever feel sorry for myself. While styling a promotional shoot for a TV show one of the lead actors approached me about personal assistant work for him and his wife. Four years later they are my enthusiastic cheerleaders, generous bosses, sources of grocery and rent, as well as genuine friends. Still, at the end of the day I could think, “I run errands… for a living.”

Well, what does that bring? They have freed me to never miss an audition, modeling gig, or opportunity. Not to mention these foundational years of my marriage were free of stressful jobs or distractions. It’s been me and Drew enjoying one another. Also to PA a successful actor made for a job where I never felt too many millions of miles from my desires.

Fast-forward to last week and Kim, my best friend and genius of Wildfox, offered me a job beyond our usual fun photoshoots. I adore her so much because although I’ve never asked for a job she’s always given them to me freely and with confidence. “Would you want to design store windows for us?” and later, “You want to help us style our shoots?” Well, hell yes.

So Kim and I played big time Barbies together. We dressed and placed nine mannequins for a store in Pasadena that wanted to feature Wildfox. I felt like a kid in a candy shop while we perused the place for cute pieces, dug through our bags of tights and jewels, and christened each girl with a wig of our choice. These Barbies are a hell of a lot more cumbersome than the ones we used to have but the sheer weight of them gave us a workout to boot- every twenty six year old fashion lover’s dream!

Next week I’ll be helping Kim, Emily, and Meredith dress our three gorgeous models for Wildfox’s next shoot. It will be a lot of errands and a handful of taking backseat and PA’ing but  I can call myself “actress, writer, PA, AND stylist” again, which I love.

Jason Ell

I’m quite sad to not know what I would have written these silent 6 months. I know there was fear of failure, a bombshell of news which caused more immense pain than I’ve ever known, a change in my body type to “womanhood” that I’ve slowly embraced, and a series of victories large and small.

Drew and I flew to Mexico in July to celebrate Jennika’s wedding in Playa Del Carmen. She lovingly swore that our own wildly out-of-the-box wedding inspired her and Raul to shove conventions out the window. The result was a beach side celebration full of naked, painted animal dancers, an array of creatures, fire breathing, and a lot of flailing to music while we and our friends broke the waves in our dresses.

Several months later an acquaintance who tours the world with his band Thenewno2 asked if we’d like to adopt his tortoises Mortimer and Randolph. We obviously scooped up the little babies with joy. Drew’s enthusiasm reached further and wider than even mine as he ditched the tank and built a custom environment for them in our living room. Their teeny tiny spirits are such a nice addition to our lives.

Speaking of which, the entire environment in which Drew and I live has become something I cherish. During our almost 2 years in this house we have acquired beautiful possessions and found a home for everything. Everyday that I walk down my street, alive with all sorts of characters in my tale, I can’t cease to be grateful for the things (tangible and intangible) that I have right now.

October brought another Halloween at Kim’s…

Always a fancy party or few with Camille in limos (which I’ve decided are incredibly tacky)…

or with Kim on red carpets. But don’t get me wrong- no one is taking our picture but us.

Drew and I spent Thanksgiving in Newport…

Christmas in Jersey…

and a quiet New Years with Michael, Lucia, and friends.

All in all I have wonderful friends, a new job as a stylist for Wildfox, a movie on the horizon, and relationships I am so proud to keep. 2010 is poised to be a wonderful year…

Good thing I’m doing something with my life, otherwise ALL my friends would make me feel terribly inadequate. They are all so talented in numerous ways.

Exhibit A: Kim, Emily, Cas, & Meredith for Wildfox. 

Meredith, thank you so much for the feathers. I cannot afford to buy them and do not possess the mad skillz you do to make them.

This is yet another one of those things I was longing for with all my heart about 2 years ago. Now, I have them at last… exactly 7.5 days before the girls in Beverly Hills discover and pay 503 bucks to wear into the freakin’ ground what people in Silverlake got into a year ago and people in New York already stumbled upon and got over 3 years ago- you know how it goes. Next stop, Forever 21 and a mart downtown.

Anyways, thanks for the 7.5 day opportunity to be ahead of the game! Seriously though- they are beautious!

Me.

<3 Also, HAPPY BIRTHDAY KIM- my beloved sister! <3

!!

Can’t wait for your party on Saturday!!